Slice Stories: Grip and Rip


In golf etiquette, it’s considered impolite to talk, hum, whistle, or make any kind of noise when someone else is hitting. But sometimes, it’s impossible to do so. Here’s a story told to me by a friend that may well be nothing more than urban legend, but it’s funny as hell, so here it goes.

As the story goes, my friend was playing with his regular foursome, one of whom was a cronic slicer. But miraculously, he had gone nearly the entire round without slicing even once. The group made it to the 18th tee, and the slicer teed up first. It was right at this moment that the microwave burrito my friend had ordered at the snack bar caught up with him. Right before his buddy teed off, he ripped a tremendous fart. And his friend, sadly, was unable to complete his round slice free.

It was sad for all parties present, above all for my friend, who in addition to the normal shame incurred while passing gas, was also shunned for messing with his golfing pal’s good round. But fortunately, the four of them laughed it off after the round was over with a good old Caddyshack reference: “Did somebody step on a duck?”